Tonight I found
myself crying at the drop of a hat. What’s wrong? I really didn’t know. I guess
I still don’t really know. But I can guess that Satan was trying to get me
down. You know, if Satan can distract me, he can cause all kinds of mischief in
our ministry.
So, what did I do?
I cried! And I cried! And I cried some more!
And as I cried, I
talked to Jesus.
Yesterday I was
randomly hit by intense grief. This December marks 10 years since my Pop went
to heaven. I think of my Dad often, but only on rare occasions do I find myself
crying uncontrollably. Yesterday was one of those days. I am saddened that my
children never had a chance to meet my Dad. They never had a chance to love
him, or to be loved by him. I miss his smile and his laughter. I miss the
twinkle in his eye that told you he was up to something.
Today I was hit by
the isolation factor that comes from living in a remote town at the edge of
nowhere. It’s hard to describe where we live. It truly is the end of the road.
And it’s the middle of the jungle. There is no cell phone coverage. There are
only a handful of telephone lines, and they are used like telephone booths by
those that own them. And the only internet has sketchy reception, not to
mention that it’s not convenient to head to the internet café.
As I bemoaned all
that I do not have, God encouraged me to make a complete list of all that we’re
missing out on…ballet classes for Ellie, tae kwon do for the boys, VBS, AWANA,
Sunday School, sleepovers at Grammy and Grandpa’s house, Christmas dinner with
family, Sunday dinner at Grammy and Grandpa’s…the list goes on.
And then He
reminded me how unsatisfied I was in Idaho.
We had so much. We gave up so much. But we have gained so much more by
answering His call to obedience. Don’t get me wrong. Life in Idaho was good. I was happy. I was
surrounded by family and friends. But it wasn’t where God had called me.
I was called to the
ZK people. God has prepared me for life in “Pine Hill.” My kids may not get to
do ballet or tae kwon do, but they have travelled to 5 different countries
outside of the U.S. and
they’ve seen more of the U.S.
than most Americans have! They will soon be tri-lingual. And they won’t grow up
learning Bible verses in AWANA, but they will grow up seeing how the Bible
transforms lives. And they will be a part of the work that God is doing in
“Pine Hill.”
God is moving all
around us every day. There are many
people who are interested in hearing God’s Word. Pray that God will work deeds of salvation in
the midst of “Pine Hill.”
“Yet God is my king from of old,
Who works deeds of deliverance in the midst
of the earth. “
Psalm 74:12
