The Wounded Soldier

     A lot has been done in recent years to address the invisible battle scars that our military soldiers inevitably acquire during their years of service to our country. I by no means wish to diminish those scars by comparing battle wounds, but as missionaries, we have their own scars too.
   

     What makes it hard for a missionary?

• I am the enemy. As a child we were told, "sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt." While it may be true that words do not physically harm us, they do take their toll. We are often laughed at simply because we have greeted someone in the street. We are stared at every time we leave our home. Lies are spread about us frequently. It's hard to build friendships in this environment
• Scabies, Salmonella, Brucellosis, Typhoid...the risk of infectious disease is constant. We've encountered all four of these, plus many others that I can't begin to name.                                         One of my children injured his foot to the point that he had intense pain when he put any weight on it. The easy solution in the U.S. is to get an x-ray. Here it's not that easy. We did take him to the hospital that's located an hour away. We were happy that there was actually an x-ray technician there that day. And they had the plates. (Is that what they call them in English?) But they did not have the liquid needed to develop the x-ray.                                                                       On another occasion, my youngest son suffered a severe eye injury. It was a 2.5 hour drive to find an eye specialist. Such a scary day! We prayed the whole way there that he wouldn't lose his eyesight. 
• Diarrhea, headaches, nausea...again, in the U.S., it would be a simple procedure of going to the lab and getting the necessary tests run. The people we live and work among suffer these symptoms frequently. I almost think it's become "normal" for them to have these symptoms. They rarely seek medical attention. And yet, most of the time they are contagious. Because of poverty and isolation, there isn't really a solution for them. They can't afford a trip to the city to get the tests done. And even if they did, they rarely have enough water to keep bathe or mop their floors. We often suffer the same illnesses because we choose to be with the poor, to eat the food that they offer to us, to drink whatever they hand to us. 
• Marriages are damaged. It's hard to find someone that you trust to watch your kids so that you can have a date night with your spouse. For us, in our situation, even if we could find a babysitter, there isn't anywhere that we can go. Sure, there is a taco stand in town, but going there would not make for a date night. It would be ministry as we visited with anyone who wanted to talk. 
• Conversations with my children are difficult. Don't get me wrong. In the long run, these are the kinds of conversations we should all have with our kids, but sometimes I'm not ready. A few years ago, our 12 year-old neighbor died when a tree fell on him. My son, age 7 at the time, took the death very hard. He hid in his bed, under every blanket and pillow he could find. When I finally found him, his first words to me were, "Does this mean that Felipe is in hell?" That's a lot for a child to process. We've had lots of similar conversations that I wasn't ready for--abortion, homosexuality, teenage pregnancy, drug trafficking, and more. 
• Loneliness and Depression. We lose a lot of friends. We say goodbye frequently to the people we love the most. When I say goodbye to a friend, I know that we can stay in touch through social media, but my children don't have that option. Their best friends live in other countries, or even other continents! (Ultimately, that's really awesome, but in the moment, it hurts our hearts.)

I would have despaired unless I had believed

 that I would see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. 

Wait for the Lord; Be strong and let your heart take courage; 

Yes, wait for the Lord.

Psalm 27:13-14